Tag: #30DaysProud

Day 3: Writing a Novel

Day 3: Writing a Novel

Welcome to Day 3 of my #30DaysProud project! Today I share how proud I am that I completed a novel. I participated in NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) in 2012, and completed the required 50,000 words for the first draft of a novel.

The challenge was fun and I honestly saw some of my best writing blossom from it. I hope to someday take the opportunity to revise the novel I drafted and make something of it.

The working title of my novel is Amends. It is about a working class family in the Boston area who struggle with mental illness and addiction, and how they overcome their challenges through love. It is loosely based on some of my life experiences, but it is fictionalized.

An excerpt of my novel is below. In it, a priest relays the parable of the Prodigal Son. The Prodigal Son has always been one of my favorite stories in the Bible. The reason I feature it in the novel is because it somewhat mirrors what is going on with the family in the story.

I am sharing it via video and text, so read however you prefer. I hope you enjoy it.

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We always dress our best for Sunday Mass. I’m wearing a dark emerald green dress with white flowers on it and lace-looking ruffles at the sleeves and the bottom. Underneath, I’m wearing white underwear, white tights, and a white slip. My chestnut Dorothy Hamill cut bounces as I walk and my Mary Janes click along the sidewalk in front of St. Paul’s.

I hate my haircut. It makes me look and feel like a boy, even when I’m wearing a dress. Mum loves it. She cuts it for me and says its easier to maintain. Whenever my hair grows long, it gets knotted up so badly that she has to cut it anyway. This keeps it under control. I’d rather have a rat’s nest of a hairdo than look like a boy, though.

Mum looks like a raven-haired Lady Di. Her short crop sports stylish waves. There are a few gray strands in it that you don’t notice unless you’re close to her. She wears a long string of fake pearls she got on sale at Filene’s Basement. They’re tied in the middle. She has large pearls in each ear that look more like mini brooches than earrings.

During Mass, I think about everything but God. I think about my crush, Tommy. I think about the new Babysitter’s Club book I have at home that I want to start. I think about going to Brigham’s with Nana Teresa and Mum after Mass and what kind of ice cream sundae I’ll order.

The organ starts playing, and everyone begins to sing the song in the hymnal, number 336. I frantically turn the pages of the hymnal to find it. Father James and the altar boys come down the long aisle of St. Paul’s. One boy is carrying a cross and stands in front of Father James. The other follows Father James, and is carrying The Holy Bible. Father James carries incense, which he disperses as he walks down the aisle- moving his arms from side to side to capture both sides of the congregation. Mum hates the smell and covers her nose. I kind of like it.

St. Paul’s is one of the largest churches in New England, and wins the title for the longest aisle. During weddings at St. Paul’s, the organ player always has to play the wedding march slowly while the bride makes her way down the aisle.

I knew I was going to get married at St. Paul’s someday, with Father James officiating. I would probably marry Tommy Fiorentino. Mrs. Fiorentino always told us that Irish and Italian people always made the most beautiful babies. That’s why she married Tony Fiorentino.

Tommy was beautiful. He had jet black hair like James Bond, olive skin, and hazel eyes. I wish I was as good looking as him and his sister Christina.

Dad would walk me down the aisle and give me away to Tommy, who would wear a black tux, white vest, and white bow tie. Tommy and I would make beautiful babies together and live happily ever after.

Father James took his place at the altar.

“In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit,” Father James said, as we all made the sign of the cross. Head, heart, left shoulder, right shoulder.

“Amen,” the congregation said.

“The Lord be with you,” Father James said.

“And also with you,” the robotic congregation responded.

“Lift up your hearts.”

“We lift them up to the Lo-ahd.”

“Let us give thanks to the Lord, our God.”

“It is right to give him thanks and praise.”

I may as well have been asleep through most of Mass every Sunday. Even the pew people- watching was boring… everyone was so well-behaved at St. Paul’s.

My favorite part of Mass is Father James’ message, the only part of Mass that wasn’t scripted.

After Father James got through the routine, which bored even him, he began:

“I’m sure many of you are familiar with the parable of The Prodigal Son. For those of you who aren’t familiar, this is a story that reveals the true nature of God and His unlimited forgiveness.

“This may surprise some of you, but God doesn’t care what you’ve done in the past, or how much of it you’ve done. God only cares about who you are today. Right here. Right now.

“In the parable of the Prodigal Son, documented in the Gospel of Luke, Jesus tells us about a father and his two sons. The older son is obedient, works hard, and does everything he can to please his father. He spends the money his father bestows to him wisely. He does everything ‘right.’

“The younger son is the complete opposite of the older son. He wants to get away from his father’s rule, and he leaves his father’s home the first chance he gets. He travels far. Let’s imagine it in modern terms. The younger son leaves the suburbs of Boston for the bright lights of Los Angeles. He wants to make it in the movies. He gets into the film business, makes important friends,  and squanders every cent his father gave him on fancy clothes, liquor, and women. He’s having a grand old time.

“Then a famine strikes Los Angeles. Suddenly, there’s no money for anything extravagant, and food prices increase as supplies run low. The younger son has never experienced such hardship. He struggles to survive. He begins working on a pig farm, and envies the pigs because they eat better than he does. Can you imagine wishing to eat what a pig eats?

“Finally, in desperation, the son journeys from Los Angeles all the way back home to Boston. He doesn’t know what else to do. He wishes for nothing more than to return to his father’s home and to tell his father that he is sorry. He has never felt so separated from his father, and that separation leaves him with an aching heart.

“And he’s embarrassed. He thinks, ‘Maybe I shouldn’t return home. What if my father is angry, or rejects me for disobeying him? What if he strikes me dead? Or worse, what if he takes one look at me and tells me never to come into his presence again?’

“Then he has an idea. He says, ‘I will apologize to my father and offer to be one of his hired servants. Even his servants are eating better than I am now!’ So he returns home.

“His father sees his young son coming down the road, his son, whom he hasn’t seen in years! Tears well up in his eyes. He is overjoyed that his son is alive and safe. He notices the terrible clothing his son wears- torn and tattered. He looks thin and frail. He doesn’t have a coat on, and he looks like he is freezing.

“He sees the look in his son’s eyes, a pitiable look. It is clear that the son realizes he has wronged his father.

“But the father doesn’t care about that. Instead, he sees that his son needs a coat, a hot meal, and a drink of water. The father is filled with compassion. He runs down the road to meet his son, throws his arms around him, and kisses him.

“The son says, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son.’

“The father calls to his servants, ‘Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet: And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry.’”

Father James paused.

“For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.

Father James paused again.

“Some of us find this unfair. The older, obedient son certainly did. He thought, ‘Why should my brother be shown any compassion? He sinned! Here I am, having obeyed my father my entire life, and nobody’s throwing me a party, or celebrating!’ He refuses to enter the party and celebrate with everyone else. Instead, the older brother confronts his father.

“The father, in his wisdom, says to his son: ‘Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine. It was meet that we should make merry, and be glad: for this thy brother was dead, and is alive again’ and was lost, and is found.’

“The word of the Lord,” Father James concluded.

“Thanks be to God,” the congregation responded.

Day 2: Overcoming Culinary Challenges

Day 2: Overcoming Culinary Challenges

Guys… I got the BEST gift from my in-laws for Christmas: the official Thug Kitchen cookbook.

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OMG! I have followed Thug Kitchen on Facebook for about a year and am so excited to finally have the cookbook. All of their recipes sound sooooo scrumptious and healthy.

This week I tried three new recipes. Two from Thug Kitchen, and one from Pinterest.

I’ve probably mentioned here earlier that I am culinarily challenged. I REALLY lack confidence in the kitchen, but I LOVE to eat good food.

I think part of my lack of confidence comes from my depression/anxiety and not believing in myself enough. I have always convinced myself that I suck at cooking, and I usually approach new recipes with a lot of anxiety. I think my belief that I suck at cooking became a self-fulfilling prophecy.

This week I realized that I don’t suck at cooking. When I actually try and stop worrying about it, I’m not bad at all.

The Thug Kitchen cookbook aptly begins with the following quote from Julia Child:

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So I figured that from now forward I would approach cooking with a similar “what-the-hell” attitude. Sometimes recipes don’t come out right. Sometimes you just need more practice. WHO CARES. Don’t apologize. Ever.

The first thing I made this week was quinoa and broccoli burritos. I was expecting my husband to dislike them, because they don’t have meat and had the potential to be spicy (he can’t handle much spice). In fact, they turned out great and we both loved them.

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BAM! Sticking a tab on that recipe. Here’s a link to it if you’re interested. These burritos aren’t only delicious, they’re filling as fuck (now I’m slipping into Thug Kitchen speak!).

On New Year’s Day I made spiced apple waffles, which were posted on the Thug Kitchen Facebook page (they’re not in the cookbook, FYI).

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These turned out okay, but the consistency wasn’t perfect. I might have mixed them a little too much, or I didn’t cook them enough. Oh well… they were still good and worth a shot.

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The third thing I made this week was Crockpot Chicken Parmesan soup, a recipe I found on Pinterest. I wanted to make this because ever since we moved back to the Boston area, my husband has made it his mission to try Chicken Parmesan from every Italian restaurant we visit or order from (those who are not from the Boston area: we have A LOT of authentic Italian restaurants and it is the best stuff on this side of the Atlantic. If you visit this area, be sure to get some amazing Italian food and pastries in the historic North End of Boston).

I made this slow cooker Chicken Parmesan soup for Greg, my sister-in-law Bailey, and her boyfriend Steve. We ate nearly the entire pot between the four of us! I think it turned out well, and the three of them seemed to think so too. This is a great recipe to prepare for a cold day, or for a day of watching football on TV with friends. You could even bring it to your Superbowl party!

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What I learned this week is that you shouldn’t convince yourself that you suck at something without giving it a true shot. Also, be kind to yourself. If you don’t get it right the first time, there’s always next time!

And just for fun, here’s a picture of what I look like after dicing onions. My husband was laughing at me the entire time.

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So there’s my second day! Stay tuned to 28 more days of #30DaysProud!

Introduction: 30 Days Proud Project

Introduction: 30 Days Proud Project

Happy New Year, everyone!

As you can see from what I posted above, I am venturing into the world of video for the new year. That was about my 7th or 8th attempt. My first few attempts failed because I had to learn to speak CONFIDENTLY and not sound boring.

Seriously, I sounded like these ladies:

Good times, good times.

I don’t really do New Year’s resolutions, but this project just happened to coincide with the new year. I have depression, and this time of year is usually harder for me. I put on a good front for the sake of the holidays, but I tend not to feel too great inside.

I’m hoping that this project will give me more confidence and help me live more positively.

My husband challenged me to this project because he noticed that every time I talk about one of my accomplishments, I lace it with something negative.

For example, the other day he reminded me about how hard I worked to earn my bachelor’s degree. I immediately followed it up with, “But that was after I dropped out of college, and now most people I know have their master’s degrees.”

That’s my depression talking. So the rule he gave me was that any accomplishments I share or things that I’m proud of cannot be laced with any negativity. I cannot downplay my accomplishments in any way with statements like the above.

The things I’m proud of must also be my OWN accomplishments, or reasons why I think I’m awesome. So the other rule is that I cannot say things like, “I’m proud of my brother for __________.” Each day I have to share something about ME (as much as I love complimenting and recognizing other people).

So here goes! Join me on my journey and share what you’re proud of (if you feel inclined) by using the hashtag #30DaysProud. I intend to use video for this project, but you can share your #30DaysProud in a blog, social media post, etc.

Happy New Year, everyone! I look forward to sharing this project with you for the next 30 days!

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